You Only Get A Minute

"A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away,” I was a young man with opposable joints and lean muscle mass that I didn’t have to work so hard to maintain. All of my bones had symmetry and my face didn’t look like one of those old Atlas Road Maps. I could get out of bed without having to think about it first and eat food without having to look at the caloric content. Pain was something I experienced frequently in martial arts training, but it didn’t linger like a stomach virus.

My outlook on life was very different. Despite the fact that I joined the military in the early 80s when nuclear war with Russia was eminent, the future still had bright possibilities and I saw myself growing old with my young wife, but never “too” old that I couldn’t do everything I was able to do at 25.

My body magically did everything I it wanted to do. I could participate in two or more training sessions and work a full shift in one day. I drank coffee after 9:00 am without it keeping me awake that night. I participated in some pretty tough, full-contact sparring sessions, took hundreds of falls, allowed people to put me in painful joint locks and wouldn’t “tap out” until I absolutely had to. I got “choked out”once or twice and had to brought to consciousness with smelling salts. But it was all good. I had the feeling mentally and physically of invincibility. I think God purposefully places that quality in young men for a reason; old men don’t win wars.

Yep, fully functioning body, solid outlook on life and faith, confidence and self-assurance. Had it for moment. That was then.

But you know, there are a lot of things we don’t have when we’re young, things like limits, perspective, experience and wisdom. Most of us realize sooner or later that all of those realizations come with a cost. Bad decisions, poor judgment, words said in anger that you cannot retract, pain you caused yourself and others that is forgiven but not forgotten. And you take credit out on your body that sooner or later has to be paid back. Yeah, God has us youthful for a reason. If we really knew the cost of a life well-lived, we’d probably all stay at home in Mom and Dad’s basement.

Some people do. “Stay home, stay safe” was supposed to be a temporary precaution in an uncertain time. Sadly, some of us use that as a life philosophy.

You simply cannot age well without experiencing loss, regret, and pain. That’s how wisdom happens; it sure as hell doses’t happen if you never take a risk or learn from your mistakes. I think we all know at least one person who, even into their 40s and 50s, still makes poor life decisions. In a nutshell, it happens when we chase after youth. But you only get to be young once. Unless, of course, you’re into plastic surgery.

Can we talk about plastic surgery? Holy cow. Ever hear of Botox parties where people take turns injecting themselves with this nerve toxin? There’s a reason why it’s used to subdue muscular contractures in MS patients. During my brief dating stint (thank God that’s over) I met a couple of women who had so much plastic surgery that one big sneeze could blow the whole works. Don’t get me wrong, men have the same hang ups, we just express it differently. Sports cars, hair plugs, younger women, etc. Chasing after something we are all only supposed to have once.

My best friend recently reminded me that there is no point in trying to relive the life we once had. It had its time and place and it’s over. Trying to recreate it is pointless and why would you want to? I mean, sure, there are things I’d like to be able to do again, but in their place are skills, abilities and clarity that I would not trade for anything. Even the pain it took to get here. This is now.

So, I can no longer side-kick a hole through the universe. I have to begrudgingly step off the mat some times or modify my technique when I know my body is saying, “Dude, 25 was a long time ago.” But it’s all good, really. My training has never made more sense to me than it does right now. And life outlook, well…still bright but with the knowledge that it can change on a dime. That’s good to know. You appreciate a lot more when you realize you only get a minute.

What are you going to do with your minute? May I give you a few friendly suggestions? Oh, come on, you've made it this far. If you have young kids, don't try to give them so many activities and experiences that they don't experience you. If have the love of your life, realize that "forever" is only as long as you're both still here, so love well. Put your heart and mind into whatever physical thing that you do and realize that it's ok to modify when you have to. Don't worry about what other people think when you take risks. They're just mad because they don't have the guts to do what you're doing.

You only get a minute. Don't waste it.

Dave Magliano

Tatsu Dojo

Jissenkan Budo

Dojo Cho